Wednesday, February 10, 2010

The "late" latest

Ooops. Sorry. I meant to update about a week ago. See, here's the thing. I start chemo. I nervously start to anticipate my decline, even though I feel perfectly fine the first few days. I feel the slide begin, and my mood shifts. Eventually, I hit bottom, and start thinking about how to describe what the bottom looks like. What it's like to always have fatigue. To gag every time I look at a pill. To not understand if I'm hungry or nauseous. To not really want to chat or e-mail or write. Anyone. Besides, my computer is waaaay up at the top, and I'm still on the bottom. So I take a serious nap. And then another. And another. Then one time, I wake up, and I feel like I have more energy than normal. My lips start quivering with excess energy whenever I talk. My mind starts racing around the inside of my head. And so I leave the house. I go for a hike, a ride, a walk. I try to meet up with all the friends I hadn't seen for the past week. I e-mail way too much. And I forget to keep everyone up to date on my blog....

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